Tuesday, 9 July 2019

Moving In With Olly

I never thought I’d see the day I’d be out of my parents house. This feeling is spectacular and I hope it never fades away. Just the fact of not going back to them is a relief in itself but the fact that I have moved in with the love of my life makes it even better. IIIt’s just mega-exciting for us now. Everything has changed. And the flat is really easy for me to get around because it was a new build in 2016. It does have doors which I was worried about, but as long as those are open they are easy to steer through. They are nice big doorways for me to get through. I honestly thought I’d be with my parents until one of them popped their clogs and I’m just so thankful that Olly is there to save the day. Well, save my day. 

It is difficult - we’re kind of living in a limbo stage at the moment. 

We are having to camp out on the sofa bed that his parents bought us because the spring in his bed has come out and given him a nasty gash. It was lucky we were bought a sofa bed! At least we know it’s comfy when we have guests round to stay!

I’m just getting through the days in a bit of a daze because I can’t believe this is my life!

I feel like I’m gonna wake up in a minute and find this has all been a sensational dream. Honestly, that is how it feels. 

We have bought a bed - which is coming on the 15th. It is an iron frame which will make it easy for me to grab and help me get up. We got other bits and pieces for the flat. We’ve got until the 15th to sort what we can out. And if we don’t, we don’t. It’s not the end of the world. We’ve cleared some boxes and made as much progress as it’s possible to make and not tire us out. That is really important. We need to relax too. I think we’ve got a good balance at the moment. Beyond eight o’clock we start to close down shop at the moment. But we’re so busy unpacking and getting sorted that by the time it gets to being any later we’re beat.

This is just unbelievable to be happening in my life. I honestly can't believe this is happening to me. This is all such a dream and I'm with my perfect partner. He's so brilliant - and I am so lucky to be with him. He is so understanding and he's just what I need. I don't deserve him and that is the truth. I am just so thankful and I love him so much. I owe him so much.

It's so exciting I'm overwhelmed a lot of the time that I can't even speak!

It's just so good my life right now.

This is so unbelievable. I cannot fathom the words to explain how dream like this feels. Right. Now. It's just incredible. Take the best feeling in the world and times it by ten and that might get you close to how I'm feeling right now. This is crazy. Olly has changed my life. I am so much stronger because of Olly. I'm a better person. I love him so deeply with everything I have. 

Don't get me wrong I do love my parents and they have done more than words can ever express for me  but now is time for my adventure!  



Tuesday, 7 May 2019

Style Crisis!

I have splints which I wear when I can.

Now, it's really annoying cos I have loads of beautiful boots which are unsuitable with the splints.
There are many reasons for this, mostly being that they are high heeled.

My splints actually have a heel built into them so my actual heel is elevated anyway.

In that case it makes what I wear awkward.

If I'm wearing my splints I have to wear lose fitting jeans so that they are looser at the bottom.

Now this makes styling my clothes quite difficult.

If I'm feeling up to it I'll put my splints on to walk around for a bit depending on how I'm feeling.

But because it depends on how I feel at that moment I can't really plan.

So that sort-of sucks.

But the way I look at it, it's exciting!

I get to reinvent the look that I give myself every day!

I have patterned leggings or jeans that fit me perfectly when I go without my splints.

But I can always plan what I will wear on my top half irrelevant of the jeans/trousers.

Well, partly.

Having such fitted jeans means that I always look good when not in my splints but it's a little harder to maintain when I am wearing them.

I love cosying up in my fitted jeans when I don't have my splints on.

But that means I don't exercise myself and that means I have a fairly easy day.

Which is obviously is not good.

We should always be looking to improve ourselves.


A Review Of 'Bull' by The Pranksters

'Bull' written by Mike Bartlett.
As seen by me on the 2nd May 2019

What a fantastic show! Hard-hitting and expertly timed lines that really touched me. This is a play all about how bullying keeps going long into our adulthood.

Growing up being bullied myself , it showed how in work situations that can happen too.

Now, we never find out the company that the three main characters work for, but that is beside the point, I think.

It shows that it can happen to anyone, at any time and for any reason.

Tim Brown played the main character with excellent pathos and humour. The other characters in the play weren't interested in his backstory or what he'd done to get where he was. Kirsty Lane and Jeremy Gooding showing off their skills at being decidedly nasty under a veil of good honest hard workmanship. Phil Snell also appeared giving the audience a glimpse into how business organisations really feel when it comes to the upper echelons of management.

Showing the time when new blood comes in, unfortunately sometimes, at the price of old blood. Marie Gardener directed the four actors and this script with the humour and ferocity that the play deserves. The stage set like a boxing ring with a water-cooler at the centre shows what a night you are in for.

It was a great show, it really piqued my interest as I could relate with it on so many levels.
Firstly, I was bullied at school so I know what it's like to be picked on and made to feel bad for needing assistance and/or help. I had two best friends at primary school, one who left due to unforeseen circumstances and another who was taken off me by my enemy. Which is why I've never felt like enough on my own. It was an absolutely ridiculous thing to be bullied for and it made me feel very sorry that I existed. That feeling has never left since. When I wallow in self-doubt or pity that feeling always comes back.

Watching this play made all those feelings come back but I'm glad. It just goes to show how strong I am now.

In the play, the main character hadn't turned up with the right paperwork and needless to say that was his undoing.

It was performed at The Star pub in Guildford where I have to be lifted inside up 2 steps. It would have been nice if the pub had invested in some portable ramps to combat this but both staff and production crew were on hand to assist. I wasn't able to go to the bar to get a drink but fortunately Ollie got me a rum and coke.

I was helped into The Star pub in Guildford by Oliver Matthew Bruce and Jeremy Gooding. Jenny Swift was on hand looking out for Oliver and myself. It was a really fun evening. I was later escorted out by Oliver Matthew Bruce and Mark Ashdown.

It is on again at the Leatherhead Drama Festival on the 15th of May.
The next show The Pranksters are putting on is Romeo and Juliet by William Shakespeare in The Guildford Castle Grounds and that will be on the 5th to the 13th of July.


Wednesday, 24 April 2019

My Life Has Changed For The Better

Whoa ... this has been a long time coming and I apologise for the delay!

It's been quite crazy!

With work where I volunteer I haven't had time to do any of this!

I will make time for this - interestingly at work it has been suggested that I start a fashion blog myself - so please watch this space!

Apparently I'm so stylish every time I go to the office!

I am finally in a loving relationship and I couldn't be happier! It's as if Olly just fell out of one of my dreams. It really is.

Now we are moving in together and the process has exceeded every expectation I have ever had.

The landlord is okay with changes that I might need. It's so amazing and just crazy!

I was talking  to a friend and even 12 months back I wouldn't have believed that I would be in this position.

It's been a bit of a whirlwind ever since Olly turned up in my life and one that I hope never ends. He never ceases to amaze me and he is so understanding of my every need that how I ever got by without him is a mystery to me.



Wednesday, 14 November 2018

Kick Into Action

My baby had words with me about not researching what he’s interested in. All the information is there at our fingertips (if you have an internet connection) and so we just need to be able to harness that information. It’s all there. Now, fair point I don’t often go out of my way to research stuff. I guess it’s a bad habit. Which my baby is trying to free me from. So I don’t blame him at all. Sometimes I just need a kick up the arse! 
I’m so interested to find out what he likes and the reason why and it’s time to grow up; be an adult and find out things for myself! I really needed someone to tell me this, so as ever more love bleeds out of me for Ollie than ever! 
Now I have quotes scattered all around my room at home and it’s really time I started taking my own advice. Today is ur someday. 
Today is your day; you can make it positive or negative. Hopefully it’s the former and you can be positive about the changes you are making. 
It strikes me how much time we waste being angry or not pushing ourselves to be the best we can. 
With my disability I do tend to get tired easily and in no way am I making excuses for the behaviour I present but I do need more time to work on stuff. I will get there but in my own time, is all that I can say to defend my position. I have an active mind still, and as long as that keeps burning inside me, that’s all I can hope for.



Wednesday, 10 October 2018

Hiya, A Review Of Waterskiing

Whoa, I am so sorry it's been so long I have been really busy. Actually living my life as apposed to stazring at the walls....which I have much experience of. I want to post about the awesome time I had waterskiing but I've been doing so much in between it's hard to know wherfe to begin!

My life is certainly busier, more fabulous and more adventurous since I met my beau, Oliver Matthew Bruce. He just takes my breath away...he's so beautiful. And he has a kind heart. I still can't believe how lucky I am to get to have him in my life. How blessed I am that he lifted me out of the confines of loneliness which I felt trapped in...

Waterskiing was incredible. I was doing a taster session with Sportability which is a fantastic charity. (www.sportability.org.uk) It was thrilling and freeing. I even fell in - but felt so secure that by the time fear fizzled to the surface the instructors were helping me back onto the ski. The way it worked I sat down to waterski. You have to have enough upper body strength to remain sitting up whist a rope pulls you along at speed and I am lucky enough to have that ability. It was awe-inspiring, adrenelin racing. It was such an incredible experience that I can't wait to repeat!



Friday, 3 August 2018

All These Thoughts...

Sorry I haven't been doing this as regularly as planned...I can only apologise.

I hate being singled out for being disabled. I used to get it a lot at school and things have improved as I have gotten older but it's still there. I am just an individual with different needs. And different doesn't mean bad. It's just that, different. We all are. I am different and there's nothing I can do about that. And even if I could, I wouldn't. Why would I trade my life for one of perfection? Perfection would be dead boring.

Plus where would all the adventures disguised as challenges come from? Adventures do come disguised as challenges most of the time, and there is no shame in that. If it challenges you then it changes you in some way, albeit small, but it might change the way you look at something which is no bad thing. These are adventures, let your mind see them as such. If you change the vocabulary you use, you can change your mindset about a lot of things.